Have you ever had a word or phrase that kept popping up in your life? Since January I have heard a word spoken to me almost everywhere I turn. Perhaps you have experienced this at one time or another. Often it is a message you need to learn or grab hold of in that season of your life. My word is “unstoppable”! Like a light being switched on or as a startling sound, each time I have heard or read this word over the last few months it caught my attention. I knew it was a word God was highlighting for a reason.
Have you ever noticed that every time you set an intention to move forward or to embrace a change, that there is an inevitable force that tries to stop you. This force shows up as resistance! To be unstoppable, you need to understand the tricks that resistance tries to play so that you will not be sabotaged.
Perhaps you want to learn a new computer program and each time you sit down the computer freezes , maybe you want to start learning the guitar but you haven’t picked it up in weeks. You may start off in full force then something tries to slow you down. If you are like most people you may abandon the project or goal saying maybe you are just not cut out for it. Resistance may try to make you feel like there is something wrong with you because you slowed down or was put off track. You are not alone, it happens to everyone. The most successful people are well acquainted with resistance and have developed ways to get around it like hiring a coach, or trainer , and setting deadlines to keep them moving forward. The biggest reason why resistance shows up is to convince you that it’s not safe to make that change, because changing takes you into the “land of unknown”. One important step in becoming unstoppable is recognizing the many disguises of resistance. Let’s look at a few that author , Barbara Sher, outlines in her book “Live the Life You Love”:
1) I’m too busy to do it well. The truth is we have lots of time but it is being used up on things that are not adding value to our life, such as watching hours of t.v., for example. Thinking you are too busy to create the life you dream of is a cloak of resistance, rooted in fears.
2) Maybe I just don’t want it badly enough. We think that if we really wanted it bad enough we would have no problem following through all the time. This is not always true. The reality is even if it is something we are passionate about , and desperately desire, we can still be held back from pursuing something,. Barbara Sher suggests that “your most important desires can be so loaded with hidden undercurrents that the whole survival side of you simply refuses to let you go near them”. This is not a time to stop but to embrace the process of resolving the conflicts or buried emotions that surface. Embracing this process of becoming is just as (if not more) important than achieving the goal itself.
3) I have more important things to do than pursue that. We’ve been programmed to believe that adults do the important things first then do the things we love. The message is that the things we love are not as important. Perhaps if you were preparing for a job interview or a visit from a boss, but why would you all of a sudden focus on the more “serious and practical” things when you were only going to write a short story, practice playing the guitar, or do a watercolor painting or something else that makes your heart sing. It’s simply a way of pushing aside your uneasiness about taking a risk. Thinking there are always more important things to attend to is a form of resistance.
You may be among the many who engage in stressful things everyday because you have a boss, deadlines, overdue bills or creditors who will exert a force stronger than the resistance and make you complete a project you’d otherwise avoid if left to your own devices. One of the biggest keys to overcoming resistance is to become aware of it and then set up external triggers to remind you of why you are doing what you set out to. These triggers can be an accountability partner, a vision board that you see everyday, deadlines and/or incentives. Resistance is a normal part of life. Resolve today How you will respond to it!